Steamy Simian Sex

The Darwin contraversy in the doltish little hamlet of Salluit is about to get restirred by yours truly.

Last week Salluit made headlines internationally by its outright banning of the theory of evolution in its high school curriculum, outdoing even the most insanely radical of court challenges in the United States which only sought to have creationism or intelligent design given equal billing with natural selection in American high schools.

By happy coincidence, and with a little help from my Uncle Terry, I came across this article speculating that humans and chimpanzees continued to have sex with each other for a million years after their evolutionary split.

[As a sidebar, I must voice my objection over the wording of this article's title: Men Mated with Chimps for 1M Years - it begs the question of who/what women were screwing over this period of time. Either that, or our ancestral females must have been really ugly compared to our simian relatives.]

So not only is Darwinism guilty of heresy by maintaining our descent from other primates, but this recent evidence suggests our Adam, and probably Eve, were into bestiality big time. This notion, once I circulate it here in Salluit, is certain to cause all sorts of mayhem, but what the hell - I've only been back from the south for two days and I'm already getting bored.

I am also requesting the Kinks' Apeman on the local FM station. Not that the lyrics would be understood, but I'd get a certain smug satisfaction from just doing it.