Thursday, March 09, 2006

Damn Gout



The gout's got me a bit laid up today - you can't concentrate on writing when your big toe's throbbing to beat the band.

For those of you who have never experienced this pain, I want you to imagine drinking at least a bottle or two of something sickly sweet like Southern Comfort. Imagine waking up hung over as all hell, and then being forced to listen to some metal band like Rammstein for the whole morning at full blast until your headache's so bad that auto-decapitation is a serious option. Now you've got a baseline for the concept of pain.

Next, imagine a room of thirty fellow sufferers: take the aggregate headaches, and a dash of absessed tooth and testicular trauma, wrap it up into a little package and shove all that pain into the joint just behind your big toe. Then put your toe into a vise and twist until you're a quarter turn from shattering it, drop an anvil on it, and then you can begin to appreciate gout pain.

No more writing for today.

7 Comments:

Blogger Anna said...

um, I have no idea what I was on about last night... my apologies.

Hope your foot feels better soon!

5:10 AM  
Blogger Belle said...

www.goutbusters.com

Seriously, go try it. Feel better!

6:51 AM  
Blogger nanuk said...

Anna and Belle: Thanks very much for your concern. It is a day later and I am very much improved. I think I'll slip into my tutu and jeter and plier to my heart's content.

8:34 AM  
Blogger The Phosgene Kid said...

I like Rammstein. Ok they are kind of scary looking and I wouldn't want them livng next-door, but the music is ok.

Hope your gout lets up.

8:40 PM  
Blogger nanuk said...

The gout is much better, thank-you, but German when you're terminally hungover is more than I can bear.

9:17 PM  
Blogger L said...

ouch

1:10 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Have you looked into home uric acid test kits at all? Keeping on top of your UA level can help to prevent attacks.

5:47 PM  

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