Saturday, January 13, 2007

Giant Rabbits Recruited by North Korea

In yet another baffling move, puny playboy North Korean despot Kim Jong-Il has been making secret inquiries amongst breeders of Continental Giant rabbits to acquire breeding stock and bring them to his beleaguered homeland. These leporidine leviathans can tip the scales at well over twenty pounds, and are rumoured to be a source of excellent, tasty white meat.

The ostensible reason for this move is to provide a source of food for those starving in North Korean, which are pretty well all North Koreans except Mr. Kim. But this has to be bullshit.

Rabbits don't feed off air, and need to eat food themselves. And since starving hordes of human North Koreans have denuded the countryside of everything green it is doubtful that the naval embargo of Purina Rabbit Chow can be broken to feed these giant bunnies.

So what is the plan? My own belief that he plans to position them all along the 38th parallel, where they will burrow under the DMZ to eat vegetation on the south side of the border and thus provide covert access to South Korea for Jon-Il's troops.

This BBC news video raises my suspicions even further. Notice that the breeder is an East German, doubtless a former Stasi operative still committed to the cause of overthrowing civilization as we now know it.

What do you think?


Blogger The Phosgene Kid said...

I suspect Jong Il probably wants to start a rabbit breeding program of his own, if you know what I mean! I can’t imagine a woman wanting to get within 100yards of that dude.

9:34 PM  
Blogger The Wrath of Dawn said...

Oh, stop rabbiting on!*

*Sorry. Kidding. Couldn't resist.

11:23 PM  
Blogger nanuk said...

Did either of you see the "Kid Dangerous" episode with Kim Jong-Il? Absolutely hilarious!

12:13 AM  
Blogger marty said...

I think those rabbits are CIA operatives.

I have full faith in our President, George W. Bush

8:38 AM  
Blogger Fuff said...

I think he's very clever at foxing the rest of the world with his eccentricity and general barking madness.

12:45 PM  
Blogger DutchBitch said...

I think rabbits are taking over the world and I think they are rather using Kim Jong-Il than he'll be using them...

12:54 PM  
Blogger DutchBitch said...

But that's just my humble opinion. Dutchyland is too tiny to fit in any Giant Rabbits, so I don't know that much about them really...

12:55 PM  
Blogger The Phosgene Kid said...

Never saw Kid Dangerous - was there some man on rabbit action?

4:41 AM  

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